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The Ab Rocker

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Angry McPisseron View Drop Down
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Joined: 20 Apr 2008
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    Posted: 11 Aug 2013 at 2:50pm

Another excersize widget on an already overflowing market for those things, the AB Rocker looks easy. But is it really?
The host of this infomercial, "Jake" of "Body By Jake" (doesn't he have a last name?), comes through immediately with a very strong regional accent (New York? Boston? Chicago?) but product pushers with accents seem to be a trademark in the infomercial industry.

The machine itself, which is some kind of padded metal contraption you sit in, uses large rubber bands to make it harder to use, and hence provide the excersize benefits touted endlessly throughout.
The infomercial claims the machine is "as easy to use as a rocking chair" (sic) but I have a problem with that claim. No rocking chair that I know of is stuffed with rubber bands to inhibit its motion; and this machine has little in common with a real rocking chair other than the curved surface that allows it to pivot along the floor, and the fact that you're supposed to sit on it. 

Jake seems to have invented a new word for this commercial, "abbadabbers". What the hell is an "abbadabber" anyway? Is this some kind of baby talk he's spewing? A secret message to the devil? Will this word make it into the 2000 edition of Webster's dictionary?

The people he tries this evil contraption on seem to be extremely ill and unfit. None of them can even do a single sit-up. But when they get on the AB Rocker, they seem to use it absolutely effortlessly, not even sweating or crying.
Maybe Jake should take the rubber bands off and replace them with hose clamps. That'll make the machine work you.
Hell, I've got MS, am overweight, and use a wheelchair - and even I can do sit-ups that these phoney-ass actors & actresses pretend to not be able to do. I don't think that even the AB Rocker will help their "abbadabbers".

The best part of this infomercial is the brief segment where they show that guy on the snowboard jumping out of an airplane and doing some hot-dogging on his way down to earth.

Very short review, need any more be said? Phoney acting, but not that terrible a production overall.

Two toilet seats.
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