(possibly disgusting) Late Night Activities... |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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If that was true, you would have already shown it to us. I KNOW you know that 'sharing is caring' and it isn't nice to tell fibs, so...let's try again: Do you REALLY have a DOMAGRON, or are you just pretending to be the kid with all the cool toys?
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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Doubt it. Dunno about the fake corn kernels included in the package, though. But now that you mention it... One thing I used to do to entertain the neighbors'/friends' kids was to take a Tootsie Roll, form it into the shape of a turd and say to them "Oh no, I think I just crapped my pants". Then I'd reach back into my pants (Tootsie Roll in hand), pull out the reshaped chocolatey treat, and show it to them. Then I'd sniff it and say "Sure does smell like crap", then lick it "Tastes like it, too". Then I'd offer it to them. After they declined, I'd pop the rest of it into my mouth..."Mmmm, this is delicious!" Kids loved that. |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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I dunno if it's a "Domagron", but I got my fake sh*t at a joke/magic shop on 9th Ave., San Francisco in 2000. It's faded over the years---to a greenish color. In Vegas, I bought this cup of some sorta goop that when you put your finger into and then pull out, makes a fart sound. In fact, it makes every fart sound known to man. Like in real life, you never know the tone/cadence/pitch of the next fart. |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Bummer. Should be edible. |
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verminstew
Junior Executive Joined: 21 May 2008 Location: Charm City, MD Status: Offline Points: 922 |
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Alright, here's the poop story that will end all other poop stories on this board:
Right before Thanksgiving 2016, I had surgery. 3 1/2 hour procedure, open wound, lot's of feelgood meds. Unfortunately I am one of those people whose bowels wake up from anesthesia 3 days later. I could feel the pain in my gut and knew I was in trouble. It was like my butthole was trying to give birth to a bowling ball. I was so impacted that watery stool was running out uncontrollably. I, like Thor a couple of pages back tried to fix the problem with my fingers. I also tried putting my sphincter muscle in reverse hoping the thing would go back. So I pretty much sat on the toilet with a leaky butt for 5 hours until my beloved Husband came home with a Fleet. About 10 minutes later I think I sh*t out the whole state of California. Lesson here, never ever forget to take stool softeners pre-surgery again. |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Do you think a big cup of hot coffee might have done the trick? It always does it for me. |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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That seems pretty odd. Every time I've gone under the knife, I've not been allowed to be discharged until *I* prove I can 'discharge' - and that means both ways. One time they had some old, but huge Germanic-shemale weightlifter/nurse, name of 'Hermanette' (or the like) roughly insert a greased tube the size of a Slurpee straw right up the ol'urethra and drain me of all processed fluids while I was desensitized on an abundance of Demerol. I think I filled up a bucket, doncha know... "You're lucky - no infection.", is what the roughly 6'6", overly-muscular blond shell of a bomb told me. Just what I needed to hear during those moments of 'the pain of the drain' from what looked like an oversized reject from some MTV late-night cartoon.
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Somehow I don't think that any woman that has given birth is going to feel much sympathy for your difficulty, unless it was the size of a softball...
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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okokok...this thread is FOS, thus far - it immediately took off in an unintended direction from the outset.
Well, let me refresh it a bit. JUST NOW back from cleaning the kitchen floor after looking in the fridge for a late-night snack only to have a container full of green bean casserole fall out and all over the floor. Loads of fun, I tell you. |
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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I'm exhausted - fell asleep on the remote while shows were 'on-demand', so the volume went up and I slept/was haunted by episode after episode of 'Paranormal Lockdown' but after enough ghosties, I rolled over and apparently caught a few episodes of 'Say Yes to the Dress'. I'm feeling disgusted, yet left wondering if I look good in white polka dots on a blue background? Shirt, that is...
I have to learn to turn off the Idiot Box at night.
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Get into the habit of using the sleep timer function. |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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^yeaaaa....that's on the other remote I don't use - guess I am 'set in my ways', doncha know...but I might have to change because I scared to death I may someday wake up feeling the need to watch QVC for special deals on summer handbags and pearl necklaces...(if anyone notices such, please shoot me immediately)
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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I don't think there has been a more popular poop topic on this board, ever!
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Careful there ron.. Remember how the standards and practices dept feels about such things... |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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Oh! C'mon Jimbo! Lighten up!
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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so 'Trailer Park'
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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^
You've seen the movie!
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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Goin' downtown looking for Mr. Roun' Brown?
Not on your life! Just confirmation of another of 'Nature's Little Miracles'... One of my favorite late-night snacks is freeze-dried veggies, especially peas, beans, and corn. Let me tell you a little of this about THAT (corn): It DOES re-hydrate in your stomach, only to magically appear in your stool. Imagine my surprise when I turned around and told myself, "I didn't have corn-on-the-cob, last night! Where'd THAT come from?!". Yea, yea, yea - I had forgotten about the freeze-dried snackies, doncha know...
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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You should probably delete the video too.
I'm on double secret probation!
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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^? nothing wrong with the video, unless he started screaming "Not the red!"
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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verminstew
Junior Executive Joined: 21 May 2008 Location: Charm City, MD Status: Offline Points: 922 |
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I've heard of coffee enemas being good for your pooper and all, but I don't think the coffee's supposed to be hot when injected
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verminstew
Junior Executive Joined: 21 May 2008 Location: Charm City, MD Status: Offline Points: 922 |
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This was an out-patient procedure, so once I woke up and was able to ambulate on my own they threw me out. The times that I was in-patient, I had to prove that I could move my bowels before they let me go home--gotta love that "hat" in the hospital toilets. I guess they just don't care if you're not staying overnight
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Yeah, I've heard of those too and you're probably right about not shooting any kind of scalding hot liquid up your rectum. But I was talking about good old fashioned drinking a nice hot cup and letting it soften everything up from the other direction. |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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I can't believe I forgot to post this in the poop thread!!!!
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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^^^ol'Mule? Why you post a little video of your youthful days? We all can tell it's you coming down that slide! Aren't we supposed to post pics or videos of ourselves in the CIH Members thread? And this thread? Even though it remains FOS, that was NEVER the intent, but rather a normal byproduct of early posts and the resultant flow thereafter.
But you in that little outfit? What a CUTIE! You sure were a 'keeper', doncha know...
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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