Cuddling |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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Posted: 26 Feb 2014 at 3:07pm |
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Big day here in my area. The Cuddle Connection is opening in the town next to mine. It's a place where one can go for therapeutic hugs and cuddles. $49/hour. I'm sure it'll be arousing success. Can't help but think of the Two and a Half Men episode in which Charlie Harper covers the desk at Alan's chiropractic business while Alan runs an errand. Instead of just answering the phones, he hires a hot masseuse, and within minutes, turns the business into a successful brothel. Unless Charlie visits this place, I can't see it lasting more than a month. Who would go to such a place? |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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"Appropriately dressed and clean" I was hoping there was some rules.
Cuddling in a recliner? That's no fun. What if someone has gas, do you get a pro-rated refund?
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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There's a sucker born every minute as the saying goes.
I suppose if they let you buy cuddle time in increments of an hour, & the staff ("cuddlers"?) are hot chicks & buff dudes, they might do OK. Wonder what they'd list on their tax returns under "occupation"? And talk about exploiting & cashing in on human suffering.... Geeez.... |
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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For $49/hour, I'd expect the cuddler to hug my farts, and tell me how wonderful they are. |
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insanity213
Ad Exec Joined: 16 Mar 2011 Location: Texas Status: Offline Points: 7806 |
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$49 an hour ... Does that cost include a happy ending??
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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I'd be interested in seeing who the hell they have in their waiting room. I can't imagine who would go for this service. |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Apparently, they're anticipating an all-male clientele, judging from the part of the article where they talked about how they'll deal with customers getting boners.
"Ya see that pitcher of ice water sitting there, bub....?" I could not imagine a woman going to a place like that. Maybe an occasional lesbian.... |
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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Heck, why pay $49 an hour for a hug in Caliwhornia when $20 will get one laid all over the 50 states?
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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msmadz
Honor Roll 8+ years on CIH Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: New York Status: Offline Points: 9952 |
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They have this crap in New York City, too. Have had it for quite some time now. How friggin' bankrupt can your life be that you would have to rely on a stranger to cuddle? Buy a goddamn pillow! Or a stuffed animal with "arms" for the same effect.
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The artist formerly known as Madawee
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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I like the 2nd one better..
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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In Big Bang Theory, Leonard recalls how, as a kid, he invented a hugging machine because his mother, a noted child psychologist, refused to hug him. His father then borrowed it. |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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That's 'cuz you're trash. |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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That's all still better than poor old Victor Meldrew, who thought he had been seeing a foot massage therapist based on the recommendation of a friend, then found out via his wife, that he'd been paying a prostitute to tickle the bottoms of his feet with her nipples!!!!
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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This thread needs an official song.
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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^^
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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insanity213
Ad Exec Joined: 16 Mar 2011 Location: Texas Status: Offline Points: 7806 |
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We should all pitch in and get Kenathang one of those for his birthday. Now and then it seemed like he could've used a hug |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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This was just featured on the local news channel. Must be a really big deal. One of the news gals was there, getting a demonstration. There are 4 varieties of cuddles on the menu---full spoon, half spoon, girl cuddle and some other one. I forget what they called it, but the cuddler sits on the bed with her back propped against the wall, and you lay back against her. The cuddler wraps her arms around you. The girl cuddle has you and the cuddler lying face-to-face on your sides on the bed, holding hands. It all seemed really sick and degenerate. |
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Jimbo
Honor Roll Joined: 19 Apr 2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 56960 |
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Nothing clean & wholesome like good old fashioned three-way, anal or S&M cuddling.
Weirdos. |
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...the ads take aim and lay their claim to the heart and the soul of the spender
Jackson Browne - The Pretender C'mon, man! Joe Biden - 46th President of the United States |
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aka ron
Honor Roll Joined: 11 Apr 2009 Location: WI Status: Offline Points: 33539 |
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What, no 69 spoon? Sheesh, how comfortable can you get on a recliner.
Spooning is great for staying warm and for new lovers. If you have a king bed, we appreciate all the room, it's easy to move around, get comfortable without bothering the spouse.
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msmadz
Honor Roll 8+ years on CIH Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: New York Status: Offline Points: 9952 |
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This business will probably come to a screeching halt when someone walks in to be cuddled aflame with hed lice, 4 inch scraggly toe nails and breath that could gag a maggot.
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The artist formerly known as Madawee
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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I'll work on that. Where can I get some nice head lice, though? |
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