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Buffalo Bill View Drop Down
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    Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 2:32am
Does anyone else hate him? I think he's overrated as hell. Everyone at my school thinks he's the greatest comedian ever. All he seems to do is scream and make stupid remarks that hardly qualify as jokes. It seems that people are hypnotized by his "liveliness."
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 2:37am
Dane Cook...






should go away


just because you scream on top of your lungs doesn't make it funnier than it is.

Heres an example of his stuff first hypothetical:


WE were in a fight and he hit me and it hurt ARAHHHHAASAAAAHAHHHHHAAAAHH THAT HUUUUUUUUUUUURTS!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WAAAAAAHWAHAHAHAHAHA, SO....so then..I punch him back BAM RIGHT IN THE KISSSSSSSERR AAAAHAHAHAHAHAH AHHHHHAHAHAHAHAH HAAHA YOU SEE THAT I GOT HIM I GOT HIM AHAHajhAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

now  real ones.

from ImDB
Dane Cook: We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful sh*ts
Unhappy

We uh... We started to do one of my favorite things. We started to make out...
[a few girls in the audience scream]
Dane Cook: Ah, thank you, sluts.

Dane Cook: Dude, smell my eyes!

from Wikiquote:

You got a big mall, going on over there. The Galleria there, holy sh*t! I went over to the mall I had to park nearby in a...in the parking structure. You know when you park in the parking structure you...it's like 40 stories and you always have to park up on the f**kin' roof. What do they pave that with? That's not concrete, whatever that's paved with, you could be driving five miles an hour it sound's like you're in a chase scene from Chips, it's like errrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhh! I'm backing up! Errrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhh! What the f**k is that! You have sneakers on, you try to walk in errrrrrrrrgggghhhhhh! Where's the door?! Errrrrrgggghhhhhhh! {CLAPPING} ERGH! ERGH! Keep it going for that joke, keep it going, it's the first of many

if (window.runOnloadHook) runOnloadHook(); When you're in that kind of fight, when you're in that kind of conflict, men and women, we want two different things, we have two different destinations during that fight. Girls, I'm going to tell you what guys want right now. This is our goal in the fight. We want to make you cry. Yes. Not a lot of crying. Not that heavy-uh-weeping cause that's obnoxious, knock it off. No, just that little tear. That one little tear, the one you try to hide by going "Why would you say that? Why would you say that?" The second we see that little glistening tear we're like "Yes! Ah ha, I win! I'm the winner! Go call your mom and talk for four hours, I'm gonna play X-box. I win." We got our headset on "Hey what's up guys? I just made my chick cry. Hey, where's the Gatling gun?" That's what we want. Instant gratification. If we can make you cry we feel like a winner. Now, let me tell you something. Let me tell you why women, why you win 99.9 percent of all fights. Yep, yep. And I'll tell you why right now. Here it is. Because you are mental terrorists. You are brain ninjas. And you know how to get in there with your katana; and just cut us and disappear into the night. I'm gonna tell you right now, this is how they do it guys, I'm gonna help you so you know when it's coming next time. And you know maybe how to stop this encounter from happening. This is what's gonna happen. You're in the fight, okay, it's going back and forth, she's preparing to say a comment, okay, she's gonna comment on tap that she's gonna say, and it's the tiniest, it’s just a tic-tack sized comment. But this is a f**king detonater. And she's gonna say it, and it's gonna go deep into your cerebellum, and it's gonna sit there and at some point, three days later, 30 days later, it's going to explode, rotting you from within, I'm telling you now. She's gonna say this comment, and here's when you know it's coming. Physically, I can show you when it's coming right now. This is the physical movement that's she's gonna give to you. You're saying "Dane, how do I know? How can I prepare myself?" Here's when it's gonna happen. During the argument there's gonna be a point where she's gonna stop and change her game up. The minute she starts agreeing with everything you're f**king saying... Look out! You are in trouble, okay. And I'll show you physically what's gonna happen, you're gonna see her leg do this (puts legs in this --> l \ kind of position). The moment her legs locks like this you've just driven into f**k-ville. And she's the mayor! So she's locked. Haha, They're lovin' it right now, they're lovin' it! Now at this point she's going to start agreeing with everything you're saying; and that's bad. The moment you start to hear her say "You know what, you're absolutely right. You're absolutely right. And I don't even know. Why would I even know because you're the czar of right and we're all just floating in the sea of wrong as you go by in your ship of right. Just please, tell me, throw me a life-line so I know. You're right. I don't even know if I'm right about this. I could be wrong about right now. But you know. Why don't you tell me if I'm right, right now." Right there. The minute she starts hitting you with that you better be prepared because there's a f**king torpedo in the water, and it's comin' to get cha! Okay, so physically, this is what she's gonna do. She's gonna lock the leg. And as she's done with her little "you're right, you're right" she's gonna do something with her hand, with her arm, and it's always different but it always involves touching her own face and doing some windshield wiper movement. Haha. She's gonna variety it up. It's gonna be something like this. And look for this, that's bad. "Uhm, no, you go, you go ahead." Now, this is what she's gonna do. She's gonna pivot her body, she's gonna pivot, then she's gonna take three to five steps. Three to five! Three to five. She's gonna slow down, cock her head to the left. She's gonna say the comment. She's gonna say the comment and here's the thing. There will be no emphasis. It will be very subtle, almost a whisper. Why is that? To make you listen. And it's going to be a destroyer of worlds. It's something like this. She's gonna do the thing, she's gonna turn. "Well, you're stupid like your father." Hahaha. And at first, that means nothing! At first we laugh at it. You say it, you walk away. "HAHAHA, what does that even mean?! Bye! Hahaha." We have no idea you just f**king ninja-ed our brain. We're gonna be in the basement forty minutes from then just pacing. And it's going to slowing start to seep in. We're pacing back and forth thinking about it. "Haha, stupid like your father, haha. MY FATHER'S A BRILLIANT MAN! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!" Pshka, explosion. Now we're starting to spiral down. And so it's at this point we need to f**king fight some more. So what do we do? We come looking for you. We come looking. And we can't even remember the layout of our own house. We're like "Where the f**k do I live? That is a pantry. Where does..." When we finally find you you're always in the kitchen. You're in the kitchen and you're feeling victorious, sitting there eating some Oodles-of-Noodles. And here's the mistake we make as guys. On the way to the f**king kitchen we didn't come up with anything to say. Ha. We have no... dialogue prepared. And that's the first mistake because when we get in there right away what do we default to... we swear a lot more, we get louder, and we point out the obvious. Right. We come in "Oh yeah, you're just gonna eat f**king noodles. Is that what you're gonna f**king do, just eat f**king noodles on your ass. You're just gonna sit there uhhhh. You're f**king, yeah. And eat f**king noodles, is that what you're gonna do? Eat the f**king noodles? Yeah. Well, who bought the f**king noodles? WHO BOUGHT THE f**kING NOODLES? Just tell me who bought the noodles and I'll leave you alone! I did, that's right, I bought the f**king noodles! Enjoy MY f**king noodles! That I f**king bought, every box, MINE! I f**king bought them. Hey, you know what? I f**king love noodles and I've loved them my whole life! I loved them, you know why? You know why I loved them? Because when I was a little boy my dad used to buy me all the f**king noodles I wanted, he bought me all the noodles, if I said "Daddy, I want some noodles" he f**king bought them and you know why he bought them because he's a SMART f**kING GUY. You don't even know! You don't even know!" That's the last thing we have to say before we leave. "You don't even know. You don't even-you don't even know. You don't even KNOW!"


some just go on TOO LONG!!!!!!UnhappyUnhappyUnhappyUnhappy


One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Dane Cook:  Not Funny.   
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote aleen Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 2:56am
Ugh.  A prime example of the dumbing down of...well...everything.  I've actually had Dane-defenders say to me, "You just hate him because you find him too edgy and offensive."  Uhhh, no, that's not it, actually.  Too bad someone like Bill Hicks wasn't still alive to kick this little frat boy's ass!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 3:00am
some of his jokes are funny, but it's a rarity, plus those funny jokes are the ones probably ripped of from Louis C.K. or someone funnier. 
One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Spicy_Meatball Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 3:09am
Originally posted by aleen aleen wrote:

  I've actually had Dane-defenders say to me, "You just hate him because you find him too edgy and offensive."  Uhhh, no, that's not it, actually.!
 
Right you are!  I like "edgy and offensive" when it comes from actual BRAINS that belong to the likes of George Carlin and Lewis Black.  I'll stretch this to extend to Ron White.   And there are some other comics out there whose names I do not know, who deserve this same appreciation.  Clap     I realize "funny" is in the ear of the beholder,  and I love bawdy humor.   What I hate is "in my face/bathroom/toilet/sex/ masturbation type junk".    I like to think a minute, before I gaffaw.  Tongue Good comedy has a "beat" to it.  It has INTELLIGENCE.  Sure sex is funny.  It's RIDICULOUS.   But I don't need to see a comic "humping the stage" to get a joke.  Unhappy
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Buffalo Bill Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Aug 2008 at 4:06am
I get a lot of, "You're just jealous!"

You know who's funny? Jim Gaffigan. THAT is good and original humor.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote musicman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 3:57am
I'm so tired of edgy.  There is no more edgy.  Edgy has been done to death.
 
Let's see how gross, offensive and stupid we can be.
 
How bout just being.....  funny. 
 
Funny doesn't always have to include talking about body parts or functions.
 
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 5:14am
No time to pay attention to that idiot.
NOTHING funny, there.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote timdubya Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 6:36am
Did somebody mention Lewis Black?
 
Dane Cook is the root of all EEEEVIIILLLLL!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote musicman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 2:21pm
What to me makes real funny, is the comedians that make observation about things that are so mundane that you think to yourself, wow I thought I was the only one who noticed that or felt that way.
 
Good example: George Carlin talking about making a sandwich.
 
When you make a sandwich, do you reach passed the first few slices of bread? You know, down to the good bread.
 
I remember the first time I heard that, I really laughed, because I didn't realize that other people did that too.
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 4:54pm
Originally posted by timdubya timdubya wrote:

Did somebody mention Lewis Black?
 
Dane Cook is the root of all EEEEVIIILLLLL!
Lewis Black runs a very close second to DC.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Buffalo Bill Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 6:23pm
Originally posted by musicman musicman wrote:

What to me makes real funny, is the comedians that make observation about things that are so mundane that you think to yourself, wow I thought I was the only one who noticed that or felt that way.
 
Good example: George Carlin talking about making a sandwich.
 
When you make a sandwich, do you reach passed the first few slices of bread? You know, down to the good bread.
 
I remember the first time I heard that, I really laughed, because I didn't realize that other people did that too.
 


George Carlin was also a great one. I was out of the country when he died, so I just found out a couple of weeks ago. Very sad. He was one of the few that rivaled Bill Cosby in innovation and influence.

I like Lewis Black. He's overrated and cusses excessively, sure, but at least his humor is coherent and intelligent.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ForumAdmin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 8:22pm
Dane Cook is a comedian who gets by on good looks and that's it.
His routines are not that funny, and when they are funny, they're funny once.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote msdeli Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Aug 2008 at 8:33pm
Your right Nathan, I was just getting ready to say that he is easier to watch cuz he's cute.  Lewis Black gets on my nerves.  His mannerisms are too predictable (like the head shaking) and they get old after about 5 minutes.  Kinda like Carlos Mencia, he was funny at first but now he is too preachy and I lose interest.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote suenewtotx Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Aug 2008 at 11:56am
My 13-year-old daughter loves him -- she thinks he's absolutely hilarious!  I don't particularly care for the guy & find him annoying.  While I do think some of his material is funny, there's something about his delivery that I can't stand.  He sounds nervous & as if he's trying way too hard; he doesn't sound natural & sounds over-rehearsed.Thumbs%20Down 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Nautigal Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Aug 2008 at 8:18pm
I'm glad I have no idea who you're talking about.
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Originally posted by Nautigal Nautigal wrote:

I'm glad I have no idea who you're talking about.


It's in your best interest to keep it that way, lest you become a zombie.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kat Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Aug 2008 at 9:37pm
He's not that bad. I don't think he's that edgy. Someone who tries to be "edgy" and thinks that makes them funny, I think, is Carlos Mencia. I hate that guy.
I love Jim Gaffigan.
And I love Kathleen Madigan too.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angry McPisseron Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Aug 2008 at 6:14pm
I've never heard of him, but just going by this thread, he really sounds like a Class A-1 fartknocker. Cry

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Wild Starchild Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Aug 2008 at 6:55pm
I find Dane Cook to be as irritating as sandpaper panties!!! I have laughed a couple times at him, but I agree, once you've seen it, you've seen it!! The wife wanted to see his movie, "Good Luck Chuck", and she wound up pissed at all the oversex that she took it out!! (sshhhhhhh!!!! *whispering) I watched it after she went to bed cause there were some pretty hot chicklets in there!! LOL But that was the ONLY appeal to me for the movie. Other than the flesh parade, it sucked!!
 
Now, Lewis Black just tickles the sh*t out of me, BUT I like rage based comedy and have performed a lot of it myself. Always have love to see someone rip into something mundane and get all pissed off about it or to, like Seinfeld, bring out the utter STUPIDITY of our day to day existence and throwing a spotlight on it! . I saw this comedian do a skit once where he was walking through a park and he got his clothing caught on a nail and ripped his pants. He went OFF!!!! He was trying to get even with the nail, and it was cartoonish. HE was a "faller". This guy could fall in ways that would have made John Ritter jealous. But he was funny because you never had seen that before. I know Lewis's response to things are kind of predictable, but that's the thing I like about it. I don't mind screaming if I know it's coming, but when that sh*tstain Billy Mays does it, I want his big ass on ice!!! BUT I will say this, Rage comedy has it's audience. Either you like it or you don't!! LOL Carlin was somewhat a rage comic also, but he did it an a smaller, quieter level. He mixed rage with observational comedy and really perfected the craft. If you throw in how friggin FUNNY Carlin looked as well, then you have major jollies!! My favorite rage comic was .........SAM!!!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BrianO Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Aug 2008 at 10:46pm
I'm not a fan of Dane Cook,either...his ugly mug was all over last year's baseball playoffs, with that 'constipated' delivery of his...'There's only ONE... POSTSEEEASONNN! There's only ONE...FALL CLAAAAASSIIIC! There's only ONE...OC-TO-BERRR!'  (one radio commentator said he sounded like he was 'going # 2' whenever he spoke!)
I sorta liked him in 'Dan in Real Life', though a lot of that was Steve Carell making him look better than he really is!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FaithSF Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Aug 2008 at 10:54pm
I LOVE Lewis Black!


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kat Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Aug 2008 at 11:20pm
I hate him. I just think his stuff gets old, SO fast. (Lewis Black that is)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Buffalo Bill Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 Aug 2008 at 2:39am
His newer special had a few old jokes, but Black on Broadway was great. Those jokes were original and excellently delivered.

Another thing I don't like about Dane Cook is that he stole from Louis C.K. That guy's pretty good.
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